Any one that has been abused in any way, let me even say traumatized in any way, has a multitude of things that go on. And we all handle the effects of that trauma in different ways. Our body reacts physically to the trauma and cause changes that actually lock it into our DNA. Whatever impressions we have or beliefs we make at the time are also locked in. Impressions and beliefs can be consciously changed by digging new grooves and filling those old trauma grooves with the fresh dirt from the grooves of truth. But we must first realize what the impressions or beliefs are that are driving us.
That understanding was necessary for me to have in order to share what I finally understood about the diet program that I have been having great success with since August 17, 2015. As of today, I am down 47.2 pounds!
I feel great and am planning to drop another 35-40.
I have been an advocate/coach of health and fitness at some level for over 40 years. I have worked at a local health club, done jazzercise, tons of workout videos, treadmill, stationary bike, and taken drops, shakes, supplements, but until now, not found a program that really addresses the truth of the situation. We have to eat less food. Period. I have been spending years trying to manipulate the situation so I could eat more and still lose weight. Not possible folks.
I know I have been using food as tool. Stuffing my feelings inside. Making myself fat so I wouldn’t be pretty so I would get raped AGAIN. All of those things for years subconsciously controlled my behavior. I have spent alot of time and effort digging new grooves and retraining my brain that food is merely fuel. It is not a reward, it is not a treat, it is not the way to escape. It is still hard as the other unhealthy grooves were REALLY, REALLY DEEP. But it is working.
Except one thing.
I have a hard time contacting the group when I need help, when I feel like cheating. Now, they encourage us to reach out and contact whenever we need help or have a question. The encourage it all the time. It is one of the foundations of their program: I agreed to ask for help when I felt like not doing the program or had a question. I have learned to ask for help in other areas of my life, so why is this so hard?
Well, for one thing, asking for help makes us vulnerable. And in my experience, being vulnerable gets you abused. That is a fact for me. I was sexually abused from the time I was little until I was 18, multiple times by multiple men, so being vulnerable was not a healthy thing. Even asking for help was not safe as that backfired on me. So I learned to handle everything on my own. That was the only safe way to survive. Fact.
But the abuse is over now. And I have S-L-O-W-L-Y learned to trust again.
But who to trust? I am very observant, as I have had to be in my experience, to try to be prepared for what was coming, so I see and notice alot. And here is what I have observed about F.A.S.T. Diet out of Omaha Nebraska.
They are knowledgeable. They are timely and thorough and have proven methods. They are truthful and not gimmicky. They are incredibly reasonably priced. They don’t pull any punches and require daily accountability but they are understanding. They have the tools in place to help you succeed. So why am I having such a hard time being vulnerable with them when I am struggling?
It occurred to me this morning. Their website address is meanestmanindieting.com.
So every night when I check in, I see that website address. EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. Every night for the last 164 days it has been visually reinforced to me that this group is the “meanest man in dieting.” That groove is getting dug deep in my brain.
So what’s the big deal you ask? So what if he is mean? Well, in my experience, mean men abuse me. And I know other mean men who abuse people I care about. So it would not make subconscious sense for me to allow myself to be vulnerable to a mean man.
And that make perfect conscious sense to me.